By Ali, Middlesbrough, UK England
PROM at 16 weeks + 2 days. Delivery at 27 weeks + 5 days.
Story added: 2006-05-06

After 14 years of happy marriage and no children, we suspected I would never conceive. Lo and behold I got pregnant naturally at the ripe old age of 39. My periods had always been hit and miss so I didn't even realise I was pregnant till I was in my 12th week. Having missed the window for an accurate screening result we flippantly opted for the amniocentesis. Oh, how I wish we'd put so much more thought into this - it turned out to be the biggest mistake of my life. At 16 wks + 2 I had that unforgettable procedure, thinking it would be plain sailing and all I would have to do was rest up for 3 days then take it easy for a few weeks afterwards. WRONG! Within 2 minutes of having the needle I felt nauseous and dizzy. On returning home I began losing a small amount of fluid so called the hospital who instructed me to go back in immediately. 2 hours later and my dream of 14 years was shattered - my waters broke in the hospital room and I immediately picked up an infection. The doctor told me in no uncertain terms I would miscarry. If not that evening, then certainly within the next 3 days. Or I could chose to terminate after a nights sleep - an option I knew I could NEVER choose. My husband and I were devastated, how could we be so unlucky? Why were we the 1 in 100 of the amnio going wrong? It all seemed so unfair. We continued with the pregnancy even though every consultant we spoke to painted a bleak picture. The infection cleared up and for the next 11 weeks we surprised every specialist over and over by still hanging on. My little son "James" was still growing inside me,all was healthy except he had no water around him - crucial for lung development I was told over and over. I took every piece of advice out there, searched the net for all I could find to put this thing right. This site offered me so much hope, I took bedrest, no housework, antibiotics and 3 times weekly blood tests for infection, no SEX! Hard work but worth it I kept telling myself. Wk. 24 and I was told to terminate again. No way, little James was too active in me, I still had hope. I read web stories over and over, absorbed all the happy endings and prayed I would be one of them. At 27 + 5 I went into labour and delivered baby James with 2 coughs. He was breech and his head got stuck but he came out alive. The consultants sadly got it right though, his tiny lungs just did not work. We had 5 precious hours with our tiny 1lb 9oz son and he passed peacefully just 10 days ago (26/4/06), a day I will never ever forget. He was so tiny but so perfect, apart from one small contracture, a club foot. We buried him yesterday, our hearts broken. To all the ladies out there I know I need to reassure you that I was that unlucky 1 in 100, you WILL be one of the lucky 99, but I can't say this to you without wanting to urge you not to go ahead with it. I am healthy, a fitness fanatic, non-smoker, why did it go so wrong for me? Good luck if you decide to go for the test but please please please look at all the other options first. If we had gone for the screening and got a reasonable result we would never have had the amnio, if only I'd known I was pregnant sooner. Inconsolable now.
6 May 2006 - Ali UK