By Kay, Pasadena, CA USAOn Thursday, September 9, 2004, we got the amnio results that my husband and I were having a healthy baby boy. I told the OB that I had been having some mild cramping over the previous couple of days, plus one spot of blood that morning, and she said not to worry. Although I had also noticed some odd, painless tightness or hardness in my lower belly, I was so excited about the amnio results that I left without remembering to tell the OB about it.
PROM at 17 weeks + 6 days. Delivery at 18 weeks.
Story added: 2004-10-20
Despite the good news, my energy was really low that night and I went to bed early. Around 4am the next morning, I rolled over in my sleep and felt a pop and then a huge warm gush. We called our OB and were told to go to the labor and delivery floor at the hospital. I had no signs of infection at that time I was admitted, but I had started to have some bleeding. While we waited for a doctor, my husband and I kept talking to our little boy, telling him how much we loved him and how we were doing everything we could to take care of him.
Around 9am, the OB came in and the ultrasound showed that there was no fluid left around the baby, although our son's heartbeat was fine. The OB then did an internal digital vaginal exam and said that although my cervix was still long, I was 1cm dialated. She said that we had no choice but to induce because of the risk of infection (even though I was still showing no signs of infection), and that we should begin as soon as possible.
After the OB left, my husband and I both broke down and cried. We were devastated and in shock about the baby, and worried about my health as well. Before they could start the medication, however, the perinatologist who performed the amnio called. He said that he did not believe that the rupture was related to the amnio since the rupture occured 10 days after the amnio, but that if we wanted we could wait until the next day to see whether the fluid would start to replenish. I told him that I had been bleeding a little, but he was unconcerned so of course we decided to wait.
My husband and I spent the next 24 hours talking with our baby and crying a lot. The nurses came in to take my temperature every hour and encouraged me to stay hydrated. During this time, I continued to have bleeding and clotting, as well as the tightness across my lower abdomen which the nurse said were contractions.
The next morning the peri did another ultrasound and although the baby's heartbeat was still strong, the peri said that my bleeding was a sign that we had no choice but to induce. The OB came in afterwards and agreed with the peri, and said we should start the meds to induce as soon as possible. I don't remember being given the option to wait for labor to begin naturally, or to have an unmedicated birth (only a choice between an epidural or large doses of Demerol).
Although the OB told us to start the meds right away, our nurse said that we should take the time we needed to prepare for what was going to happen. She encouraged us to talk about whether we wanted to see our son after he was born, whether we would like to have him baptized/blessed, and what we would like to do with his body. She also told us about some grief resources for after we went home. We spent the next couple of hours talking and crying, and preparing to say goodbye to our baby boy.
I mostly slept between the first dose of Demerol and when I was in active labor. My husband spent the day talking to the baby, trying to squeeze in a lifetime of father-son talks into those few short hours. In the late afternoon, the hospital chaplain came and said a blessing for us and our son.
Around 9:45pm on September 11, 2004, our son Natsuhiko was born. He weighed 6.4oz, was 9 inches long, and was absolutely perfect. The nurses left us alone for an hour or so to hold and talk with our son before our OB came. Because of the Demerol, I can't remember much of the time we spent with him or what he looked like. Fortunately, we have some photos and hand and footprints that the mortuary took for us, but it is just another layer of heartbreak that I don't really have my own memories of my son because of the drugs.
Because we lost our son less than six weeks ago, my husband and I are not sure when or whether we would like to try another pregnancy. I think our first step will be to find a perinatologist in the Los Angeles area who is familiar with pPROM (all suggestions welcome!) so that we can feel confident about even attempting another pregnancy. In the meantime, the stories on this website and the email list have been so helpful to us and we are so grateful to all of you for sharing your experiences.