By Jennifer Apsley,I'm 27 years old and have been healthy all my life. I was shocked when I had a miscarriage at 5 weeks with my first child. My second child (Alyssa, now 2) was full term, perfectly healthy and beautiful.
PROM at 19 weeks + 5 days. Delivery at 20 weeks.
Story added: 1999-12-28
Me and my husband had truly been blessed. We decided we wanted our children about 2 years apart, so we started trying to get pregnant in August of 1998 (when Alyssa was 9 mos. old). It took a full year, but finally our wish had come true. We got pregnant in August of 1999 and was due May 11, 2000.
The nightmare began on December 12th, when I noticed a strange brown discharge that lasted all day. I was really nervous, because with Alyssa, I had no discharge, spotting, etc. during the whole pregnancy. I called the doctor the next day, and she told me to go to the emergency room right away. She did some cultures, a sonogram, and a manual exam, and everything appeared perfectly fine. She thought maybe I had an infection, which I did not. She said it might take a week to clear up. Three days later, I noticed some red clotting (very little) in the toilet, and called the doctor right away. She told me to go back to the hospital, where they did more tests and another sonogram. Again, everything appeared fine. As a precautionary measure, she gave me a prescription for an antibiotic, and sent me home on 10 days bedrest.
After coming home, I stayed on moderate bedrest, not over-exerting myself, and spending time on the couch. 3 more days later, at 5:45 am on Sunday, December 19th, my water broke (I was now 19 1/2 weeks pregnant). I went to the hospital, and they confirmed it was amniotic fluid (the fern test). They did a sonogram and was hopeful because my fluid was still in the low normal range (9). They admitted me on strict bedrest (bed pan, legs slightly elevated), and told me that in three days they would re-check my fluid level, and hope that I re-sealed and re- accumulated fluid. Those three miserable days passed and I went for my follow-up sonogram on Wed., December 22nd. The news was bad. My fluid level was now a 4 and there were only small pockets of fluid around the baby, although the heartbeat was strong as could be and my cervix was tightly closed. They basically told me there was no hope for this baby. That, if I chose, I could go the expectant management way and maybe make it another 3-4 weeks without an infection setting in or going into labor. They said at 20 weeks the baby had no chance of survival, and if I made it to 23 or 24 weeks, maybe a 50% chance of survival, with a 30% chance that there would be awful problems associated with such a premature baby. My doctor told me that it was likely I would develop an infection that would cause scarring (and prevent future pregnancies) or that I would go into labor in the next 2 weeks.
Now I was faced with the awful decision of inducing labor or keep going with all the terrible possiblities lying ahead. I felt like I wanted to keep going, but my whole entire family felt the only option was to induce labor (not wanting to put me at risk). I went ahead with the induction that afternoon, and after 21 hours of waiting, and 2 hours of hard labor, I delivered what seemed to me a perfect little girl who only lived for 1 minute after delivery. She was only 9.2 oz and 11 inches long. She was so tiny, but so perfect and beautiful. We named her Angel Baby and held her for awhile. My whole family was there and very supportive. I went home Christmas Eve and had to make arrangements with the funeral home. We put her in a tiny little dress for her cremation.
I don't know why this happened to me and my husband, or why God took her from us - I will never understand - I just hope my faith will get me through this. In some ways, I feel like I shouldn't have made the decision to induce labor - maybe the outcome wouldn't have been as grim as was explained to me. Maybe that should have been God's call - but with the information that was given to me, I felt that was the only option.
My little Christmas Angel is now in heaven and is now my family's guardian angel. Please write me if you have any comments or support for me during this tragic time in my life. Thank you for allowing me to share my story.
Jennifer