By Michelle, Clearwater,fl Usa
PROM at 18 weeks + 3 days. Delivery at 19 weeks + 1 days.
Story added: 2013-05-14

My pregnancy was a gift and completely wanted. I had just turned 30 and my husband and I were more than ready to welcome a baby into our lives. After struggling through 12 weeks of morning sickness, I hit 13 weeks and I felt amazing. As my baby and belly grew, I grew more and more content in my life. My only complaint throughout this time was that I would feel what I called twinges of pain or “electric shocks” in my abdomen, all feelings my doctor assured me was attributed to my uterus growing. I am 5’2” and weigh around 125. “It is just growing pains” they said. It was a regular Sunday. I was 18 weeks and 3 days along in my pregnancy. After going for a walk earlier in the morning, a laid down for a nap. I then had intercourse with my husband which isn’t out of the ordinary. The moment I stood up, my water broke unexpectedly. I was shocked I had no idea what was happening. My first instinct was that I wet myself. I immediately called my doctor’s office. The on call doctor called me back. When I explained my situation, she said I most likely just wet myself. She told me to put on a pad and if I soaked one in an hour, to call her back. I did as she said, had dinner with my family, and went on with my night. I no longer had any fluid so I laughed it off as a mistake. The following morning, when I wiped I saw blood. It wasn’t much of anything at all. But I was scared and confused because throughout my pregnancy I never had any blood ever. The blood was so light and so sparse but it was enough to make me worry. So I called my doctor and they had me come in right away. The doctor performed a pelvic exam, said she didn’t see any fluid and my cervix was closed, and baby’s heartbeat was great. Once again, “You just wet yourself” she said. Feeling reassured, I went home trying to be positive but in the back of my head I knew something was wrong. Ever since the incident the day before, I noticed my baby wasn’t as high in my belly. It was as if he descended in the womb. I also felt his kicks weren’t as strong. Not to mention the fact that overnight I had lost 5 pounds. The weird twinges of pain continued but I was told to not think anything of it. The following day I was scheduled for my anatomy scan with the perinatologist. I couldn’t wait to see my baby and be reassured that he was fine. As I feel asleep that night, I woke up in the middle of the night because my underwear was soaked through. I changed my underwear and tried to go back to sleep. I thought about how ridiculous it was that I couldn’t control my bladder and now I was going to have to deal with this for 4 more months. In retrospect, I would have been happy to have that be my problem if it meant my baby was still with me. Little did I know that the nightmare was just beginning. My husband and I were like giddy kids going to the ultrasound appointment. The minute the technician put the wand on my belly, her entire composure went from happy to ice cold. I saw our little guy on the screen and immediately noticed he was head down, barely moving and no fluid. Where did all the fluid go?!!!! The technician continued with her measurements, everything measured perfectly, but she refused to answer my question about the fluid. She excused herself and two seconds later, in walks the doctor. He began asking me if something had happened, did I notice any fluid? Blood? Was I in pain? So I began to tell him my story and no I wasn’t in pain. He then launched into what every soon to be parent doesn’t want to hear “you are going to lose your baby.” EVERYTHING WENT BLACK AND UPSIDE DOWN My cervix was long and closed and I showed no sign of labor. I was admitted into the hospital overnight to watch for infection and subsequently released the following morning. My husband and I chose to undertake the “watch and see” game. My water broke Sunday. Confirmed by ultrasound by perinatologist on Tuesday. On Friday morning, at exactly 19 weeks and 1 day, my cord prolapsed. After being rushed to the hospital, I was administered drugs to start inducement since I was 1/2cm dilated. It took 7 hours of intense labor and contractions with no epidural until I was 4 cm dilated. Moments later my baby was born sleeping, followed by the horrible delivery of my placenta. Baby Michael was 9 ounces 9 inches exactly. We baptized him, held, kissed, sang, and loved him until late that night until we said our final goodbye. That was 9 weeks ago. My life has and never will be the same. I miss him everyday with every ounce of my being. My placenta came back showing signs of infection, but doctors can’t confirm if it came before or after my water broke. Since my cervix was closed two days after my water broke and remain closed until my cord prolapsed they have ruled out IC although I am not so sure. They have called this just a bit of really bad luck, a “FLUKE.” Worst. Word. Ever. They encourage me to move on, have another child, it will be ok. They will monitor more closely next time but I can’t help but wonder if I maybe am the cause, could I have done something to allow this to happen. I will never know. But what I do know is that our Lord did not want me to have sweet baby Michael with me on this Earth. He has bigger plans for my baby. I have to have faith that I will have a healthy baby with me here one day. If I don’t believe, than I have nothing. If my story speaks to you and you have been through something similar to mine and you went on to have a healthy baby please feel free to email me at michellesaydi@yahoo.com