I had two previous miscarriages over
the last 2 and a bit years. The first -
we found out at the 12 week scan and
the second- at 11 weeks.
After 9 mths of trying I became
pregnant for the third time. We were
thrilled but very nervous. I finally
started to relax a little following
hearing the baby's heart beat at
16wks. It at last seemed we might get
the baby we longed for. Other than
some mild abdo pain at times I had no
problems with the pregnancy. At 17+1
wks I was sat on the sofa, when
without warning, I felt a popping
feeling then a gush of fluid that
soaked right through my clothes. I
initially thought it was blood but
when I checked I realised it was
clear. I then thought I'd wet myself
but as the fluid continued to trickle
over the next few minutes I began to
think maybe it was my waters. My
partner called the labour ward at the
hospital as were couln't get hold of
midwife /gp as was a Sunday. We were
advised to present at A+E. At the
hospital we were refered to the gynae
ward. After some time they confirmed
my waters had broken. To our relief
the baby still had a
strong heartbeat. I was admitted, put
on antibiotics and a scan arranged for
the morning. That night I had a bleed
so they did a scan with a portable
scanner. The baby was still alive but
there was very little fluid. I had a
propper scan the following day which
showed the baby was cramped and there
was no measurable fluid. The
consultant was straight with us and
told us the possible outcomes- it
looked very bleak. We were given the
option of termination but felt we had
to give the baby a chance. I was kept
in hospital on bedrest waiting to see
if I regained any fluid. The baby's
heart was going strong throughout. The
further we got we decided termination
wasn't an option. I continued to leak
fluid. Nine days later I had another
scan which still showed no fluid. We
decided I may as well come home and
take it easy as staying in hospital
hadn't achieved much. A week later at
a check up the heartbeat was still
strong. For the first time the
consultant started talking about what
would happen should I reach 23/24
weeks. We came away thinking we had a
little fighter and may just beat the
odds. A few days later, at 19+6 weeks
I had an uncomfotable feeling between
my legs - I realised it was the cord
dropping through. We went straight to
the hospital where I was admitted
again but they couldn't scan til the
morning. After a very long night our
worst fears were confirmed. The baby
no longer had it's heart beat. I was
induced and gave birth to a baby boy
later that evening- 7th june 08. We
called him charlie.
Charlie was perfect apart from
obviously being small and his feet
were turned in due to him having
little room. I was shocked at how well
formed he was - creases on hands and
feet, finger nails and his little
toungue etc. He looked scarily like my
partner which is lovely as now
sometimes when I look at my partner I
can see Charlie.
We had small service for Charlie and
he has been buried in a pretty
churchyard within walking distance of
our home. I think this has helped as
when I feel down I can just go and
vist him and have a 'chat'. It's been
very difficult but we're getting there
slowly...
Thanks for reading my story.
My thoughts are with anyone who is
going through/has been through the
same or a similar situation.
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