Our story starts 13yrs ago.... Many
attempts, never conceiving.
Infertility issues due to obesity and
severe APA (that's an immune system
disorder and imbalance in your
red/white blood cells. Makes your body
hostile and destroys everything).
Years of multiple treatments. Then on
9/12/03 had weight loss surgery and
lost 200lbs over the course of 2
years. APA was completely gone!!! Was
a TOTAL miracle. On 9/12/05 We were
told we could conceive on our own!!!
Then on, 10/31/05 we got pregnant.
Ended at 3wks due to Blithed Ovum. We
didn't even have a minute to mourn our
baby. We were so shocked it really
happened. Then without another period,
pregnant again for the second time,
12/12/05. First due date was 9/12/06
(would have been 3 years to the date
of my weight loss surgery). Due date
moved up to 9/5/06. But one day shy of
sex test at 19wks, ended on 4/9/06 due
to PROM.
Pregnancy was such a miracle and so
hard to believe we had actually gotten
pregnant on our own! No morning
sickness, nothing but a little
spotting between 8-12wks. Always
stopped on it's on. Then at 14 weeks,
started having "round ligament pain".
By 17wks, felt pains that
were ‘different’ but each exam showed
closed cervix so we didn't panic, no
reason to. At 18wks, caught cold and
developed a bladder infection. Had
NEVER had a bladder infection before.
Was on antibiotics for 5 days. Was so
worried about the cold and fever
affecting the baby we listened for the
heartbeat everyday....Then on Friday
night April 7th, had a romantic
evening with my hubby. Had sex (will
never be able to accept this wasn't
our fault somehow) and at 3am got up
to pee. As I sat there I felt a HUGE
gush of water. Having NEVER had a
bladder infection before, I thought it
was my urethra (sp?) opening up due to
the antibiotics ‘having done their
job’. Got back in bed and kept feeling
wet. STILL didn't think this was my
water breaking. FEEL SO STUPID, how
did I NOT KNOW THAT?
Anyway, by 7am, starting to have light
spotting so I went back to my routine
of ‘feet-up and resting’. But at 2pm I
coughed and passed a huge clot. THEN I
panicked and paged my OBGYN. We aren't
in the same town so after hearing the
story, he prepared me for what had
actually happened to me at 3am and
sent us to our local ER. Upon
arriving, I thought I passed what was
my baby in the bathroom. THAT WAS THE
MOST AWFUL MOMENT of this whole story.
We found out 3 hours later, that
WASN'T our baby. I was dilated
1cm.
3 more hours later, we had an advanced
ultrasound and found my OB was right,
and we had lost ALL of our fluid. We
were told we'd have to deliver our
baby and it would not survive. Would
probably die overnight. Saturday
night they induced my labor with an
anal medication. This didn't work.
Sunday morning, we had another
ultrasound and baby was in birth canal
and still alive. They induced me 2
more times via potossim and inserted a
folly catheter. I just wasn't dilating
on my own. By 12:30pm I was finally
having contractions. At 12:50pm our
baby boy was born in my hands. Robert
Benjamin Bartle "Robbie"
7.2oz and 9"long. We were told he
would live about 10 minutes. He lived
110 minutes. A little less than 2
hours is all we had with our precious
son. Family was with us. Everyone held
him. He responded to touch but
couldn't see yet. He had my feet and
nose, my husbands hands and mouth.
Robbie squeezed the tip of my pinky at
2:38pm. His heart stopped at 2:40pm.
We've come to learn I still have a
weakened immune system due to the
previous APA and being a weight loss
patient. I also have a weak cervix and
OB has advised, next time (IF WE CAN
EVEN GET THERE) they will do a
cerclage and I'll probably have lots
of bed rest. I JUST CAN'T IMAGINE
having the courage to try again.
Robbie was so wanted and loved and we
are just trying to get through the
grief of each day.
We have a beautiful website that tells
his story and that of my parents'.
Very similar story 36years ago. You
can read about it in "Nana's letter"
on our site. If anyone wants to see
pictures of Robbie (WARNING, PREMIE
19WKS, ALIVE in EVERY PICTURE, BUT
HARD TO SEE) please visit our website
at
www.thetripleb.com/baby/baby.htm
We've come to believe the miracle our
son was, having LIVED for so long.
Yet, I don't know how to move on from
this pain and fear.
Having read some of your postings, I'm
in awe at the courage and love so many
of you have. Blessings to all of you
who tried and kept trying. I hope to
have your courage one day.
Thank you for listening to my
story.
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