After 14 years of happy marriage and no
children, we suspected I would never
conceive. Lo and behold I got pregnant
naturally at the ripe old age of 39. My
periods had always been hit and miss so
I didn't even realise I was pregnant
till I was in my 12th week. Having
missed the window for an accurate
screening result we flippantly opted
for
the amniocentesis. Oh, how I wish we'd
put so much more thought into this - it
turned out to be the biggest mistake of
my life. At 16 wks + 2 I had that
unforgettable procedure, thinking it
would be plain sailing and all I would
have to do was rest up for 3 days then
take it easy for a few weeks
afterwards.
WRONG! Within 2 minutes of having the
needle I felt nauseous and dizzy. On
returning home I began losing a small
amount of fluid so called the hospital
who instructed me to go back in
immediately. 2 hours later and my dream
of 14 years was shattered - my waters
broke in the hospital room and I
immediately picked up an infection. The
doctor told me in no uncertain terms I
would miscarry. If not that evening,
then certainly within the next 3 days.
Or I could chose to terminate after a
nights sleep - an option I knew I could
NEVER choose. My husband and I were
devastated, how could we be so unlucky?
Why were we the 1 in 100 of the amnio
going wrong? It all seemed so unfair.
We
continued with the pregnancy even
though
every consultant we spoke to painted a
bleak picture. The infection cleared up
and for the next 11 weeks we surprised
every specialist over and over by still
hanging on. My little son "James" was
still growing inside me,all was healthy
except he had no water around him -
crucial for lung development I was told
over and over. I took every piece of
advice out there, searched the net for
all I could find to put this thing
right. This site offered me so much
hope, I took bedrest, no housework,
antibiotics and 3 times weekly blood
tests for infection, no SEX! Hard work
but worth it I kept telling myself. Wk.
24 and I was told to terminate again.
No
way, little James was too active in me,
I still had hope. I read web stories
over and over, absorbed all the happy
endings and prayed I would be one of
them. At 27 + 5 I went into labour and
delivered baby James with 2 coughs. He
was breech and his head got stuck but
he
came out alive. The consultants sadly
got it right though, his tiny lungs
just
did not work. We had 5 precious hours
with our tiny 1lb 9oz son and he passed
peacefully just 10 days ago (26/4/06),
a
day I will never ever forget. He was so
tiny but so perfect, apart from one
small contracture, a club foot. We
buried him yesterday, our hearts
broken.
To all the ladies out there I know I
need to reassure you that I was that
unlucky 1 in 100, you WILL be one of
the
lucky 99, but I can't say this to you
without wanting to urge you not to go
ahead with it. I am healthy, a fitness
fanatic, non-smoker, why did it go so
wrong for me? Good luck if you decide
to
go for the test but please please
please
look at all the other options first. If
we had gone for the screening and got a
reasonable result we would never have
had the amnio, if only I'd known I was
pregnant sooner. Inconsolable now.
6 May 2006 - Ali UK
|
|