I had been so desperate to have a
baby, its something I've dreamed of
for years. Then I met my husband 4 1/2
yrs ago. We got engaged after just 1
year, but left it for 2 1/2 yrs to get
married. We always said that as soon
as we got married we'd try for a baby,
but we were both impatient and started
trying 3 mths before the wedding. We
were married in July 2002, and found
out we were pregnant in March 2003. We
were so happy, and couldn't wait to
tell everyone.
For the first 12 wks I did nothing
but worry, it seemed to take forever
to get over the danger stage, but when
I got there I still didn't stop
thinking what could happen. Everyone
kept saying that I had to stop it, and
enjoy being pregnant, but I just
couldn't. When I had my first scan I
was so pleased that everything was ok.
All was going smoothly, and at 16wks I
joined a aqua natal group,which was
really good fun. At 16.5wks I felt our
baby move for the 1st time, and I
absolutely loved it.
At last my bump was starting to
show, I had looked forward to this bit
for ages. We went shopping to get me
some maternity clothes, and I loved
wearing them because they made my
little bump look really obvious.
Then one Sunday we went to my
parents for dinner, and afterwards
decided to go for a walk. When on our
walk my mum said that I was starting
to woddle like pregnant woman do. I
was so pleased. Later when we got
back, I said I was going for a sleep.
While I was half asleep I suddenly
gushed with what looked like water. I
got up and shouted for my mum and
husband, I was wet through. When we
contacted the emergancy midwife, she
told me to go to the hospital, which I
did. When I got there they did an
internal examination, and told me that
I had urinated while sleeping, which I
thought strange because it was just
coming away freely and I'm not
incontanant. But because I liked to
think they know what there doing I
trusted there word, and went home. The
following morning I woke up, and I was
wet through again. Knowing that this
is really not right I went back to the
hospital, were they decided to admit
me for investigation. After yet
another day they discovered that it
was my waters that had broken, and
told me I had to rest as much as
possible, because there was a chance
they may heal and come back.
My consultant told me that I should
go and have a scan and see how
everything is going on in there.
Everything showed up as being fine on
the scan, and the baby had all the
water there, which was great. I
thought things might be ok, if the
sack was to heal itself. Over the next
week things were going from bad to
worse. I started bleeding, and losing
clots, but all I kept thinking was,
please can we get to being 24wks, so
that the baby has some chance of
survival although not much.
The next Monday I had to go for
another scan to see if my placenta was
still in place. But when I got there
it wasn't good news. Our baby had lost
all the water through the course of
the week, there wasn't a drop. But my
consultant said we could still have
some chance. Over the past fews days I
had been having like a period pain in
my abdoman and this was getting
gradually worse, and then by the
Tuesday it was really painful. They
then said that I was probably in slow
labour, and then offered us some
medication to induse me, as they had
done when we were first told that the
waters had gone. But there was no way
I was going to doing that , I had to
give my baby every chance at life that
I could, and I was propared to do what
it took to do that, were there's life
there's hope!
But then on the Tuesday afternoon I
lost a huge clot, and that was the
time they took me to labour suit. We
stopped there for another day, and
althrough this I was in slow labour.
The most horribe moment was that they
said, should our baby be born alive
they would not do anything to try and
keep it that way, they would just let
him/her die. I said that they could
not do that to my baby, they had to at
least try, but they said no, our baby
was to young to survive.
Then at 6.20am on 24th July 2003 I
gave birth to a little girl, but she
wasn't alive. This was the worst day
of our lives, and hopefully will never
have it happen again. We named our
daughter Lucy, and she was really
gorgous, she weighed just 375grams. 1
week later we were burying her next to
my grandma, were she will look after
her until we can.
The good news is that our test
results all came back ok, so we stand
as much chance of this happening to us
again as anyone else does. So
hopefully it won't be to long before
we're pregnant again, to give Lucy a
little brother or sister.
Thank you for reading my
story,
and God bless to our little
girl, we love
you
sweetheart.
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